i still remember my parent's reaction when one morning they discovered a short poem in my English book, i had written on request of a friend .well she was a girl friend indeed, urgently in need of a poetically framed love-letter for her first infatuation;my parents had little time to take action because about 20 years back they barely had any time to think....to think that i can still write about emotions which i shouldn't necessarily feel within.
its been quiet sometime i had started writing again after a few years of break but was apprehensive to publish.....now that am married and belong to a society with prejudged adjectives for all those who writes about anything....who are married and yet write about love not for husband may be...woman who are married and yet desires a wanderer's life....women who writes for the joy of writing and doesn't have a big brand name....women like these are not yet accepted in the family with appreciation for her work but skepticism and infidelity.
and so i was afraid
and yet i thought ...i thought about it over and again since the last few years
to whom do i belong? to my family to my friends to my neighbors to everyone else except myself?it took me years to realize ...but it was just a moment that invoked the inner self hibernating so far within; a sleep so prolonged that may i call this a new birth altogether?
when i was small i had read about Chitrangada, the princess of Manipur who was brought up to the identity of a man....only when she meet Arjun and feel in love, the woman inside was born to a new awaking...a whole new understanding of her own self. like other bengali kids so many times i have staged the charterer without much of an understanding
i read Chitrangada again ....not in books though this time....Chitrangada was within
it was a chance meeting with a stranger who shares an equal fondness of books, who invoked the words from my soul to limelight...
so may i be granted the permission to say Chitrangada is no one but the inner self...the two different identities we bear within ...when we dare to be what we are and when we dare not to express what we are...when Chitrangada feel in love and wanted to be the woman she is, she went to Madan... the god of love, to make her more feminine...Madan is there within me ,within you ,within all of us...Madan is the desire to change,the will to be truthful to self
Chitrangada i am ...who was Arjun is not mandatory to discuss ...Arjun though is here,is there at every corner and bylane...Arjun is the,magic moment of self realization....a moment we all experience at least once in a lifetime ,the moment from where may we start again...
its been quiet sometime i had started writing again after a few years of break but was apprehensive to publish.....now that am married and belong to a society with prejudged adjectives for all those who writes about anything....who are married and yet write about love not for husband may be...woman who are married and yet desires a wanderer's life....women who writes for the joy of writing and doesn't have a big brand name....women like these are not yet accepted in the family with appreciation for her work but skepticism and infidelity.
and so i was afraid
and yet i thought ...i thought about it over and again since the last few years
to whom do i belong? to my family to my friends to my neighbors to everyone else except myself?it took me years to realize ...but it was just a moment that invoked the inner self hibernating so far within; a sleep so prolonged that may i call this a new birth altogether?
when i was small i had read about Chitrangada, the princess of Manipur who was brought up to the identity of a man....only when she meet Arjun and feel in love, the woman inside was born to a new awaking...a whole new understanding of her own self. like other bengali kids so many times i have staged the charterer without much of an understanding
i read Chitrangada again ....not in books though this time....Chitrangada was within
it was a chance meeting with a stranger who shares an equal fondness of books, who invoked the words from my soul to limelight...
so may i be granted the permission to say Chitrangada is no one but the inner self...the two different identities we bear within ...when we dare to be what we are and when we dare not to express what we are...when Chitrangada feel in love and wanted to be the woman she is, she went to Madan... the god of love, to make her more feminine...Madan is there within me ,within you ,within all of us...Madan is the desire to change,the will to be truthful to self
Chitrangada i am ...who was Arjun is not mandatory to discuss ...Arjun though is here,is there at every corner and bylane...Arjun is the,magic moment of self realization....a moment we all experience at least once in a lifetime ,the moment from where may we start again...
আজ লিকছিলাম যখন
আমি দাড়িয়ে ছিলাম একা
আলোছায়ার নিচে
বিশাল মঞ্চ বাঁধা হয়েছে
আকাশ আড়াল রঙ্গিন শামিয়ানা
দর্শকের আসনে কত লোক
প্রথম সারিতে চেনা সব মুখ
আমার হাথে তরবারি
কাকে মারব কে জিতবে
যুদ্ধটা যে
নিজের সাথে নিজে
